You can’t do everything. You can’t have everything. You must choose.
This is particularly true of how we spend our time. We have a set amount of time, no more. When we decide what we do with our time, we necessarily decide what we don’t do with our time.
Choose wisely. Time, once spent, is lost.
When you touch your hand to fire, it’s good to take notice and move your hand away. You notice the pain, and then move to avoid it. The same is true of jealousy. You notice it first because it gives you a clue as to what you feel is missing in your own life, but then you move away. But that first part, noticing what you’re jealous of, is important because it points to a lack you’re feeling you may not even be consciously aware of. But don’t keep your hand in the flame, obsessing. Analyze it. Is there something missing in your own life? Turn your attention to making your own life better, your relationships deeper, your work more meaningful, your health more vibrant. That is time well-spent.
What if the world knew you only by the worst thing you’ve ever done? Assume everything’s public, no secrets, anything can be known by everyone. That’s a tough scenario, isn’t it? What would people think if they could see all the bad things you’ve done, the cruel things you’ve said, the opportunities to be kind you’ve missed?
Some of us live that reality–known by one event, judged by all and found lacking–the drug addict, the convict, the molester, the drop-out, the neglectful mom. And yet each of us is incredibly complex, capable of both good and bad, cruelty and kindness, and, most importantly, redemption.
How all of our souls hunger for someone to see that, even when we make mistakes, there is good in us, too, that we aren’t all bad. That mistake shouldn’t define us. Imagine how much more that is true for someone who has been shunned by society because of one wrong turn.
What can we do to look at each other as we see ourselves, complex, erring individuals worthy of love? What can we do to recognize that we are all kin?
St. Francis of Assisi’s timeless prayer soothes the soul today:
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me bring love.
Where there is offense, let me bring pardon.
Where there is discord, let me bring union.
Where there is error, let me bring truth.
Where there is doubt, let me bring faith.
Where there is despair, let me bring hope.
Where there is darkness, let me bring your light.
Where there is sadness, let me bring joy.
O Master, let me not seek as much
to be consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved as to love,
for it is in giving that one receives,
it is in self-forgetting that one finds,
it is in pardoning that one is pardoned,
it is in dying that one is raised to eternal life
And, for a special soul-reviving treat, listen to Sarah McLachlan as she sings these precious words. Maybe listen a few times.
What a blessing good friends are in our lives! To laugh and cry with, to play and work with, to share the ups and downs of life. Our friends lift us up and delight us and make the world a much happier place for their being in it and for their loving us.
Cheers to good friends!
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