Is it your story?

story

Are you defining yourself, or are those around you casting you in a role? Perhaps they are casting you as a secondary character in the epic about their own lives. Perhaps they are casting you as a victim or villain. Perhaps someone has branded you with a type: dumb, lazy, hopeless, worthless. What is the part you are playing in your story?

Now leaving isn’t always possible. But you do have the ability to decide how you want to show up in the world. You do have the ability to step out of the type casting and assert yourself to have a starring role in your own life.

If you find yourself taking up too much stage time in someone else’s life (ie. controlling them), you have the power to step back into a more subordinate role and let them take the lead. If you find yourself having no lines or voice in your own story, or that the things you find yourself having to do or say feel like they have no place in the type of story you want to tell with your life, it’s time to rewrite the script.

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To path or not to path?

 

walking

Have you ever used a pro-con list to make a major decision? On one side you list all the benefits of something; on the other, everything negative. We can do one on the advantages of following a well-trodden path:

Pros:

  • You will get to the destination where the path leads.
  • You will be dealing with less wild and unpredictable terrain.
  • Lots of people have taken this path.
  • You are less likely to encounter surprises.

Cons:

  • See Pros listed above. They are also the Cons.

There are definite advantages to staying on a proven path. But what if taming the unpredictable terrain and charting your own path is what you are after? What if you don’t want to do things like everybody else? What if you’re not sure of your destination, but you’ll know it when you get there? What if you want to make your own way, mistakes and all?

There are times when following a well-trodden path is unwise, and, in fact, detrimental to your mental health. If you felt a tug in your heart considering the questions in the last paragraph, now may be one of those times. After all, someone had to start one of the paths in the beginning. Maybe now is the time to start a new path of your own.

 

 

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You are the sky.

weather

You may be in a storm right now–untethered, free-falling, desperate. But the storm does not control you any more than you control the storm. You are apart from the storm.

Have you ever taken a flight on a stormy day? You board the plane, and it is overcast, stormy, perhaps raining furiously. But after take off, you climb until you are above the clouds. It’s shocking to discover that there, above the clouds, the sky is blue and clear.

Remember the storm will fade. You are not the storm. Your essence is still there above the clouds, blue in the shining sun. Hold on. The sun will come out again. (But, just so we follow this analogy to its logical end, you are not the sun either. You may have a beautiful day, but that, too, does not define you.)

You are the sky, the constant, behind the weather, influenced by the storms and sunshine in your life but not controlled by them.

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Make a ripple.

mtripples

In “Sound of Thunder“, Ray Bradbury introduced the idea that one tiny butterfly could have a far-reaching ripple effect on later historical events:

In the year 2055, time travel has become a practical reality, and the company Time Safari Inc. offers wealthy adventurers the chance to travel back in time to hunt extinct species such as dinosaurs. A hunter named Eckels pays $10,000 to join a hunting party that will travel back 65 million years to the Late Cretaceous period, on a guided safari to kill a Tyrannosaurus rex. As the party waits to depart, they discuss the recent presidential elections in which an apparently fascist candidate, Deutscher, has been defeated by the more moderate Keith, to the relief of many concerned. When the party arrives in the past, Travis (the hunting guide) and Lesperance (Travis’s assistant) warn Eckels and the two other hunters, Billings and Kramer, about the necessity of minimizing the events they change before they go back, since tiny alterations to the distant past could snowball into catastrophic changes in history. Travis explains that the hunters are obliged to stay on a levitating path to avoid disrupting the environment, that any deviation will be punished with hefty fines, and that prior to the hunt, Time Safari scouts had been sent back to select and tag their prey, which would have died within minutes anyway, and whose death has been calculated to have minimal effect on the future.

Although Eckels is initially excited about the hunt, when the monstrous Tyrannosaur approaches, he loses his nerve. Travis tells him he cannot leave, but Eckels panics, steps off the path and runs into the forest. Eckels hears shots, and on his return he sees that the two guides have killed the dinosaur, and shortly afterward the falling tree that would have killed the T. rex has landed on top of it. Realizing that Eckels has fallen off the path, Travis threatens to leave him in the past unless he removes the bullets from the dinosaur’s body, as they cannot be left behind. Eckels obeys, but Travis remains furious, threatening on the return trip to shoot him.

Upon returning to 2055, Eckels notices subtle changes – English words are now spelled and spoken strangely, people behave differently, and Eckels discovers that Deutscher has won the election instead of Keith. Looking at the mud on his boots, Eckels finds a crushed butterfly, whose death has apparently set in motion a series of subtle changes that have affected the nature of the alternative present to which the safari has returned. He frantically pleads with Travis to take him back into the past to undo the damage, but Travis had previously explained that the time machine cannot return to any point in time that it has already visited (so as to prevent any paradoxes). Travis raises his gun, and there is “a sound of thunder”.

Bradbury’s genius in considering how small seemingly insignificant changes can alter the future has, of course, become a standard sci-fi plot device. But how about applying the principle to the present. What can we do now to ensure a better future for us all? We can’t possibly know the effect of the small acts of kindness we do each day. But we do know that one kind act leads to another, ever onward, each person touched by kindness more likely to pass it on, creating an entire chain, then web, outward, expanding farther and farther as it goes. That ever-expanding ripple of kindness can perhaps circle the world if we could only track it.

In this heart-warming, and tear-jerking (in a good way) video, one man discovers just how powerful a little gesture of kindness can be.

What can you do today to start ripples everywhere you go?

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Create light.

weisellight

Hurricane Harvey has been devastating, and the images showing those hardest hit have been heart-wrenching and dark. But sometimes, in those images, we glimpse the light. Consider this video of a man stopping to play his piano even as the water has nearly reached his piano bench. He brings a bit of beauty, peace, and light to a ravaged reality.

This video calls to mind the orchestra members on the Titanic who, forced with the certainty of imminent death, chose to play until the end so the music would bring comfort and peace to those also remaining on the ship as well as those struggling to reach the life boats:

Many brave things were done that night, but none were more brave than those done by men playing minute after minute as the ship settled quietly lower and lower in the sea. The music they played served alike as their own immortal requiem and their right to be recalled on the scrolls of undying fame.

Or perhaps it recalls the story of Vedran Smailovic who played his cello, in full dress attire, even as Sarajevo was being bombed around him:

As the 155-millimeter howitzer shells whistled down on this crumbling city today, exploding thunderously into buildings all around, a disheveled, stubble-bearded man in formal evening attire unfolded a plastic chair in the middle of Vase Miskina Street. He lifted his cello from its case and began playing Albinoni’s Adagio.

Smailovic did not consider himself a hero: “I am nothing special, I am a musician, I am part of the town. Like everyone else, I do what I can.”

But a hero he was. Adding light and beauty into a dark and dire situation is heroic. It’s counter-culture. It’s inspiring. And it makes the world a brighter place.

How can you create light in your circumstances today?

 

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Now is the time.

timebuddha

Many of us carry around the kind things we mean to say or do as some sort of internal To Do list for when we get to it. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe next year. But if those kind things are what you want to do or say before you have no more chances to do or say them, you had better get on it. The promise of a new day is not really a promise. It is definitely not a guarantee. At most, it’s a hope.

So say those kind words. Do those kind things. Not just because you may not ever get the chance if you wait, but because they will enrich the lives of those other people who have no idea about what thoughts and intentions you are carrying around locked up in your head undisclosed.

Give yourself a break.

yourself

If one of your friends were struggling with the problems you are facing right now, what words would you offer in support? Would you call them names, berate them, remind them of all the other times they messed up just like this and how, honestly, can they ever expect to get anything right, ever?

Probably not. Right? But often this is the way we talk to ourselves. We replay all our other mistakes in our minds, call ourselves stupid, sink into our shells scared to face the world.

But why do we do this? If the words we would offer our friend are what we think would help, why are we so reticent to speak kind encouraging words to ourselves? Maybe today is a good day to try a different approach.

Be a kind friend to yourself. Offer yourself words of support and encouragement. Focus on all the many times you got things right. Tell yourself the truth: you are precious and beloved.

 

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Reach out.

suffering

Sometimes, we are humbled and cowed by the destructive ability of our environment. Everything we’ve built up can be destroyed in an instant by earthquake, a flood, a tornado, and we are left to build again. But into these disasters, something remarkable always shows up. The human spirit. People help each other, arriving with supplies or rescue, opening their homes and wallets. There is a buoyancy to these acts of human compassion that helps others feel protected and lifted up even when they are at their lowest point. And what a gift it is to be able to help someone feel like they are not alone.

Who’s your neighbor?

neighbor

What would the world look like if we were to actively do the things Jesus taught us: Turning the other cheek? Loving our neighbor as ourself? Loving and praying for our enemies? Welcoming the children? Feeding the poor? And so on.

To the degree that imagined reality is at odds with what we are seeing, that is where we are called to act, think, and behave differently, to close that gap.

Yes, we do not need to meet violence with violence. Yes, the whole world is made up of our neighbors, including those who don’t think and look like us. Yes, we must show compassion and concern for our enemies, love and protect our children, and use our resources to help the big picture. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Imagine what a world that would be!