Encourage

Treasure the moments

Posted on by Shari Swanson

rosekennedy

In the movie Citizen Kane, Charles Foster Kane’s last word ‘rosebud’ is an enigma. What did this fictional tycoon think about with his dying breath? In a life filled with vast wealth and power, countless deals, many enemies and some friends, he remembers the name of his childhood sled that he was riding before a loss of innocence. A moment. Not the first million dollars, or his first business deal, but a childhood moment of bliss.

Occasionally, we get a glimpse of something bigger, truer than the day to day. Often we get these moments, unexpectedly. Notice them for the little treasures they are.

Find the calm.

Posted on by Shari Swanson

chaos

 

Would it surprise you to learn there are people in this world actively trying to make you unhappy? It’s their job. For others, stirring up discontent and friction between people might be an avocation. More like sport. And we, faced with people actively working to make us unhappy, have the choice about how we respond.

Some of those attempts to unsettle us may be fairly invisible. Consider this passage by Matt Haig in Reasons to Stay Alive:

15894394_1198633253536059_3219745824596477480_n

Add to this list, all the media posts designed to separate people rather than bring them together, governmental warnings about the danger level designed to keep people in a state of fear, and the negative rhetoric coming from people living in a deeply divided world, and it’s hard to not be overwhelmed, let alone happy.

But seeing attempts to manipulate us by our emotions and fears for what they are helps us to not get played. Instead, of rushing right to a knee-jerk response, we can notice that a message is trying to get us angry, or sell us something, or to make us turn on our neighbors. That breath between stimulus and response is where we can bring our critical thinking skills to analyze what is before us rather than responding mindlessly to the attempted manipulation and just jumping right into the fray. We don’t have to play along. We don’t have to be angry or dissatisfied.

We can engage from a place of calm.

Do what you love

Posted on by Shari Swanson

vonnegut

 

Do you ever feel pulled down by the people who tell you that you can’t do something? You should mouth the words when people are singing because you can’t carry a tune. You shouldn’t dance because your moves are awkward. Don’t write unless you are going to be a best-selling novelist. Don’t take up something in your middle years that you’ve always wanted to do because you might look silly. Don’t, can’t, shouldn’t–those kind of words.

Maybe it is you telling yourself those things, afraid to start something and be a beginner after you’ve spent decades learning how to do other stuff and have gotten quite good, an expert even maybe. We encourage children to try new things–to paint, to skate, to sing, to play. But something happens when we get older. We may even hear ourselves holding someone back, “Are you still doing that? If you’re not [insert adjective here–famous, discovered, wealthy, accomplished] by now, you’re never going to be. You should give up.”

Wouldn’t it be nice to lay down all that judgment and dance again? Or sing your heart out? Or write a love poem? The joy is in the doing, and how lovely it is to remember that and embrace whatever it is that makes your soul sing!

Struggling toward freedom

Posted on by Shari Swanson

coretta

Freedom and justice are not won and done. Often the road toward freedom, justice, and equality twists and turns, full of progress and steps forward, but pitted with set-backs as well. We have made progress since Martin Luther King, Jr. led a movement for civil rights, but  his work is not done. We cannot relax. Indeed, we need to preserve and build on those gains in every generation. We need to be shocked but not surprised to encounter those who have no desire for equality but would rather return to an era of overt discrimination. Theirs is not the right path forward for any of us, including them, and they must be defeated because as Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”

 

Tickle someone’s funny bone.

Posted on by Shari Swanson

L'englelaugh

We need to periodically take time out to laugh– for self-preservation and to enhance the quality of our lives. Things can easily get too heavy, too fraught, too dire. A good laugh can release the tension and help us to regain our balance.

To assist in the laughing department, take a look at this BBC clip ascribing voices to odd animal behavior. It’s a good one. 🙂

 

Stand strong.

Posted on by Shari Swanson

intimidate

There may be those who want to silence you or refuse to hear your perspective. Perhaps you are afraid to speak your truth. Take heart. As Brené Brown says:

“Courage is a heart word. The root of the word courage is cor– the Latin word for heart. In one of its earliest forms, the word courage meant “To speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart.” Over time this definition has changed, and today, we typically associate courage with heroic and brave deeds. But in my opinion, this definition fails to recognize the inner strength and level of commitment required for us to actually speak honestly and openly about who we are and about our experiences–good and bad. Speaking from our hearts is what I think of as ‘ordinary courage’.”

Take heart. Your voice matters.

One day at a time.

Posted on by Shari Swanson

oneday

Can you remember what you were worried about this date last year? Often, we forget yesteryear’s worries. Even more often, what we were worried about never comes to pass. It was wasted energy. All those sleepless nights and anxiety were spent on the thought of something that happened only in our imaginations. And, studies show, constant worry is bad for our health, ironically, giving us more to worry about.

Today, focus on your tasks at hand. Today has enough worries of its own. We don’t need to pile on tomorrow’s worries or the next day’s. The more we immerse ourselves in concrete action, the less our minds have time to churn away on what might or, most likely, might never be.

Take this day.

SaveSave

Enjoy the journey.

Posted on by Shari Swanson

journey

Sometimes our eyes and hearts are focussed so far in the distance, that we fail to see what is right in front of us. The people we spend our days with, the beauty surrounding us, the opportunities we have to make a difference. When we zoom in to the detail, the richness of the particular moment can be astounding and surprising. What a beautiful, remarkable world we live in. So full of complexity. Each person we see is as full of contradictions and surprises as we are ourselves. Each living or created thing we see is so full of detail.

Long-term goals are great, but what a shame if we don’t appreciate each step along the way. We may work side by side with someone but barely know their name let alone what their hopes and dreams are. We may be so busy moving forward that we are blind to the heartache of even the people we live with. It is easy to speed through life with eyes averted like people descending in an elevator focussed only on the floor numbers.

Today take time today to enjoy the journey, the mysteries unfolding all around you, the people who share your path, and all the beautiful and startling things right here, right now.

Like, for example, who can not stop and be amazed at this little beagle shaking its jowls, its great ears flopping to the beat, its sturdy paws holding on in front but shifting with its wagging tail in back, the gorgeous landscape behind it? What a fascinating little miracle, right here. Just this.

Little miracle of the day.

SaveSave

What’s chasing you?

Posted on by Shari Swanson

runninginside

We can gussy ourselves up on the outside. Or maybe change jobs or move. Or start over in our relationships. And yet something still eats at us. We have the same insecurities even when we reach our dream weight or buy a stunning outfit. We encounter the same obstacles over and over again, even in different scenarios. In these situations, we need to turn our attention to the inside. We need to consider what is bothering us or holding us back and do the work that needs to be done there.

Carpe diem.

Posted on by Shari Swanson

berries

Today is the day. Seize it, use it, enjoy it, fill it up with meaning and truth. Don’t wait until tomorrow. Now. Today. Here. This moment right here, right now, holds all your opportunities for action.